Hey guys, before we get to the mailbag, I have a question, do you like good dogs? My friends at Ruff Start Rescue are in need of your help. If you are looking to adopt a dog, are available to foster, want to volunteer, or just have a few extra bucks to help some good boys and good girls, give them a look. Thanks!
Now, time for questions!
Q: Was it worth it for Netflix to spend hundo million $$$ on Friends? – Mike
I mean, for them? Probably. The internet was in a frenzy during those 24 minutes people thought Friends was going away. People were throwing chairs out windows and rioting in the streets. It was chaos. I boarded my doors shut and called all my loved ones. I wasn’t sure I was going to make it. Could you imagine if Friends fans had to resort to watching their DVDs or one of the 240 episodes that air a day on cable? That would be horrible.
I have no idea how much $100 million is to Netflix but it is obviously a lot more than the $30 mill they had been shipping off in order to have Joey to say whacky one-liners and Phoebe be annoying BUT THAT’S NEITHER HERE NOR THERE.
I just hope this doesn’t result in the prices rising for the rest of us non-Friends people. If it does, you Friends people have to come over and bring me snacks while I watch BoJack.
Q: Can we replace Christmas sweaters with a new trend? – B.Z.
I am fine with the Christmas sweaters. They are fun, easy, cheap, festive. Sure, it was funnier when you were actually digging these things out of your great aunt’s closet rather than just buying them new at Target. Just the thought that somebody had once wore that sweater unironically was what made the whole thing great. But it is still people in red and green sweaters drinking and being jolly. It’s still great.
Also, I can’t even think of what the new trend would be? Christmas overalls? Reindeer costumes with faux fur? Borat swimsuits made of Christmas lights? Let’s just keep rolling with the sweaters.
Q: When are you going to open a gym where all the treadmills have a Nintendo? – Corey
Man, this really is a great idea. We just gotta make sure people wipe down their controllers when they are done. Could you imagine riding an exercise bike while playing Mario 3? I would be in good enough shape to qualify for the Tour de France. Will somebody who knows how to do things please make this happen?
Also, with the release of the easy plug-and-play NES/SNES Classics, why don’t we just have them everywhere? I was thinking about this the other day in a waiting room where some stupid Judge Judy episode played on mute. Waiting room at the dentist? Hook up a Classic. Car mechanic waiting room? Hook up a Classic. Church atriums? HOOK UP SOME CLASSICS! Let’s go!!!!!!!!
Q: Was the guy who proposed with [six] engagement rings supes cute or supes extra? – Julie
I really try to stay away from criticizing how other people choose to get engaged, ya know? It isn’t you getting engaged, why does it matter? Maybe it is really special to them. Let them have that moment. It only matters if the two people involved dug it.
Alright, THAT BEING SAID, six engagement ring guys is a total knob. For those that missed it, some guy proposed with six engagement rings so his girlfriend could pick which one she liked best. They had a photographer there and everything so clearly this was set-up to go viral. Whatever. Glad they had their moment.
Buying six rings isn’t a baller move. Knowing the exact type of ring your future-spouse wants is baller. Heather casually mentioned her ring size one day during happy hour like two years before I proposed, but I knew she was the one at that point so I discreetly emailed the size to myself so I would have it saved. Then whenever she mentioned something about rings I would email what she said to myself. Also had some friends do some sneaky recon. I knew exactly the type of ring she wanted without her having any idea I knew the exact type of ring she wanted.
OK, if that last paragraph sounds super braggy it is just because I ended up proposing in front of the Donkey Kong machine in our living room. Had to give myself a little bit of a boost before mentioning that part.
Alright, that’ll do it for this week! Let’s all raise a tall glass of orange juice and toast to the weekend! Everybody go out and be good to each other this weekend.