Every Friday on GoMN.com Dana Wessel answers your questions. Music, sports, pop culture, whatever you want. Have a question? You can tweet them to @DanaWessel or email him at Dana@GoMN.com. You can read the Ask Wessel archives here.
Q: I am getting married in a month. The planning process has been fun for me and I have been relatively chill throughout, but now the stress is getting to me. How can I avoid being a Bridezilla? – Leah
I started writing an answer to this question and then had a moment of clarity. I am not qualified to answer this at all. Yes, I am married. Yes, I have been through this. But it was my wonderful wife who was carrying most the pressure and stress heading into our big day. So without further ado, here is Heather to offer some advice and make her Ask Wessel debut:
Yeah I am answering this one for Dana. All Dana knew about our wedding was that he was supposed to put on a suit and show up at Como Conservatory on September 10. He did a great job*.
*Although I forgot to tell him to comb his hair. That was unfortunate.
Weddings do a strange thing to your brain. All the sudden things like centerpieces, flowers, and uplighting seem super important. But guess what. They aren’t. I don’t remember what the flowers or the centerpieces or the tablecloths looked like. All I remember is that I felt beautiful, I was in a room full of people I loved, and I got to publicly declare my love for my favorite person on earth. It was seriously the best day of my life, and when it came down to it none of the details mattered.
Identify what is causing you stress and either cut it out of the wedding or delegate it to someone else. This is one of the most exciting times of your life and you need to soak it all in. When you feel stressed, put on romantic music and picture yourself walking down the aisle. The anticipation of the day is almost better than the day itself, so relish in it.
With that said, if you need to be a “bridezilla,” be a bridezilla! Ask your family and bridesmaids for help. They should be happy and excited for you and they probably don’t want you to be stressed. If they seem snotty about helping out, then fire them and hire me. I am a great bridesmaid.
Here is a photo of me not sweating the small stuff. I am legitimately happy even though my groom has unkept hair and two Chelsea bracelets on.
Thanks, babe! That went well. I think in the future we should do an entire column called Ask Wessel’s Wife where Heather answers the questions. So look out for that coming soon. Start sending in questions for my wife, but please, go easy on me.
Q: When can we start getting excited about the Vikings? (Like, after the Super Bowl parade, right?) – Christina
Right now! Get excited. Get pumped. Seasons like these don’t come around very often. Enjoy it. I know it is built into the DNA of Minnesota sports fans to be waiting for the epic collapse or heartache, but what if, just once, it never comes? Remember how Boston sports used to be a laughingstock? They were just like us. Expecting heartache at every corner. Convinced nothing good would ever happen again. Then everything changes. That can happen here, too.
So enjoy the ride. It is almost Christmas and the Vikings have a realistic chance at winning a Super Bowl IN MINNEAPOLIS. I know it is hard, but try to forget the past and just enjoy the weird, fun ride that has been the 2017 Minnesota Vikings.
Q: Settle the debate. Is Love Actually overrated? – Stacia
This has turned into quite the debate over the past couple years ever since some (Buzzfeed probably) article came out proclaiming the movie a piece of trash. It’s a popular trend on the internet these days. Take something everybody loves and boldly proclaim it sucks. Like, for example, the other day when I said on Twitter that every Pixar movie besides the Toy Story franchise is hot garbage. But we will save that discussion for another day.
Love Actually is fine. It isn’t a classic, it isn’t awful. It’s just fine. It has some good moments and a good overall message but is overly long. There is a great romantic comedy in there if you rip out like four or five of those storylines.
But its biggest flaw is the one scene that they should have put in the film. You know when Rick from Walking Dead holds that dopey “To me, you are perfect” sign for his best friend’s wife? Love Actually would have been an all-time classic if his best buddy would have come down at that very moment and kicked the holy sh*t out of him.
Q: Do you have any rules you follow as a sports fan? One rule I follow is I never argue or brag to someone about how big of a fan I am of a team. I’ve met many people who say things like “I’m a bigger fan than you because I (fill in the blank).” After they say that I tell them, “Good for you.” – Tim
I am with you on this 100 percent. These people are the worst. They act like they are somehow better than other fans who aren’t as passionate as them. I saw this a lot when I worked in sports radio. People would always preface their (typically awful) phone calls with “I have been a season ticket holder for XX years…” OK? Great. Do you want a prize?
I have a US Soccer tattoo on my body. Did that entitle me to be any more upset or crushed after we didn’t make the World Cup? Of course not. Neither does owning season tickets, or having countless jerseys, or going to see the team play on the road. Spending money doesn’t earn you Sports Fan Points or give you the right to belittle anybody who doesn’t have that same opportunity. Just count your blessings that you are in a spot to cheer your team on the way you do. I have a feeling the people you claim aren’t “true fans” would love to switch spots with you.
Sports are an escape. There is no right or wrong way to be a fan. You aren’t better or worse than anyone else. As I have often said in this space, at the end of the day, we are all just rooting for grown men and women in matching costumes playing games designed for children. No need to turn it into a giant whizzing contest of who is the biggest fan.
Q: My friends and I were telling first kiss stories the other night and it got me thinking, what location do you think the most first kisses have taken place? – Molly
Oooh. Good question. I reached back out to Molly for clarification. We are talking about VERY first kisses here. Not first kisses in current relationships, but elementary-style crush first kisses. First time you kissed a cute boy or girl you liked.
Here is a top five list.
- School – Gotta be, right? It was the only place you saw the person you had a crush on when you were a kid in elementary and middle school. There was always smoochin’ happening in the locker bays or before you got on the bus.
- Parks/playgrounds – Another common one. Nothing like biking to the park with your friends to rendezvous with cute girls.
- Woods – This is where my first kiss went down. Woods behind a friend’s house. So scandalous. Her name was Kate. She was cute.
- Closets – Everybody played 7 Minutes in Heaven at some point during an early boy/girl party in middle school. Plenty of first kisses had to have gone down then.
- Cars – Not every first kiss took place before the d-license. I bet tons happened in cars as well.
Q: A week until [Star Wars: The Last Jedi]. Any predictions? Who are Rey’s parents? Who is the last Jedi? – Joe
Honestly, I don’t have any predictions. I have only seen the first trailer and one other TV spot and only because it blindsided me on TV one day. That isn’t because of apathy, either. Quite the opposite. I am very excited, but I just want to go into the thing with a clear mind. I don’t want to be one of those people that breaks down the trailer frame-by-frame looking for clues or potential spoilers. I just want to sit back, relax, and let the creative storytellers tell their story. I am beyond stoked.
But since I can never resist the urge to be able to come back and go “I CALLED THAT!!” here are a few predictions.
Rey’s dad? Chewbacca
Rey’s mom? Maz Kanata
Last Jedi? Watto
Luke’s first three words to Rey (I know this is already on the internet, but I haven’t checked)? “You bring weed?”
Most shocking death? 3PO. Luke finally has enough of his annoying bullsh*t and greases him with a lightsaber 10 minutes into the flick.
Character I am already annoyed won’t have enough screen time? Poe Dameron. Give me a Poe spinoff. NOW.
I’ll have some (non-spoiler) thoughts on the movie in next week’s Ask Wessel so come back then and see how I did on these predictions.
Q: In the great food war of 2030 will you fight for pizza or tacos ? #teampizza – Jason
Pizza is superior to tacos in every way. Sorry, taco people. But it just isn’t even close. I will go to war for pizza over tacos any day of the week. I stand with the Pizza Resistance in the Great Food War of 2030.
But none of that matters. The world will clearly end before we get to that point.
Alright, on that happy note, that’ll do it for this week. Let’s all raise a tall glass of orange juice and toast to the weekend! Everybody have a great weekend and stay warm.