It is almost that magical time of year. The time where in the blink of an eye we go from sitting around the Thanksgiving dinner table with family to head-butting somebody’s great aunt at Kohl’s for the last InstaPot. That’s right, Black Friday is almost here.
Now any dumbass can open up a Best Buy or Target ad and tell you where to get a good deal on a TV or where you can find Sausage Party on Blu-ray for $3. This Black Friday shopping guide goes deeper and looks into the steals and deals you can find locally on Craigslist to surprise your family with this holiday season.
I know what you all have been thinking lately. “Wow! Disney+ is amazing! But…where is all the great Mr. Ed content I crave?!” Got ya covered. You and the family can now gather around the TV this holiday season and watch one of the top-five talking horse TV shows ever made…all just for $8!
Picture this…you get up early Christmas morning so your family can wake up to the sweet, sweet smell of 300 hotdogs cooking at once…just like in all the classic holiday movies! Imagine the look on their faces when they run down for their traditional Christmas morning dog. This is just like those cars wrapped in big bows except MUCH better.
You know how fun it is to go to the local county fair and go on a rickety, unsafe ride? Now you can OWN one of those beautiful cars. You will be the envy of the neighborhood when you park this bad boy in the front-yard. Everybody in town will be lined up for a picture. Charge $5 a selfie and this thing will pay for itself — and the tetanus shots you will need.
Sick of your son “OK Boomer”-ing everything you say? Just wait until Christmas morning when he unwraps this bitchin’ Ozzy hat and realizes how cool you REALLY are? He will finally see you for the bad-ass rock mom/dad you who can spot a bop from a mile away.
Nothing is bigger as we close the chapter on another decade than vintage and nostalgia. Vinyl? Huge. Throwback clothes? All the rage. Old school video games? Massive. The next big wave in this trend will be in the bathroom. Get ahead of the curve by getting one of these classic pull-chain flushing toilets. Finish your business, reach up, pull down, and strut outta the bathroom like a boss.
Saved the best deal for last…your very own HORSE!! I know, a little expensive. But I guaran-damn-tee you that you will not be able to get a trained horse for this good of a price at Target or Best Buy on Black Friday. How blown away will your family be when they come downstairs on Christmas morning to see this beautiful creature eating carrots next to the Christmas tree in the living room?
Hope you enjoyed this guide to all the great deals you can find on Craigslist this Black Friday. Skip the big box stores this year. Buy local.