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In addition to making your mornings suck less on Go 96.3’s Morning Show, Dana Wessel is our station’s resident cinephile. Think of him like Ebert, Roper and Siskel combined, but way cooler. Check out his monthly movie preview below. 

We are back for another monthly movie preview, you guys. It is May, which means that blockbuster season has officially begun. However, you wouldn’t know it by the start of things. Avengers got pushed back to the last weekend in April. So the first few weeks of May is this weird middle-ground between Avengers carryover and the opening of Deadpool II and Solo, where the studios are throwing a bunch of sh*t against the wall in hopes of finding some table scraps.

On that note…onto the movies!

May 4

Bad Samaritan – David Tennant, Robert Sheehan, Kerry Condon, Jacqueline Byers, Carlito Olivero, and Lisa Brenner

Thriller with pretty cool premise here. A pair of valet attendants at a ritzy restaurant have a scam where they rob people’s houses while they eat by using their cars GPS system to find out where they live. They end up finding some a woman chained up in a house they rob and don’t know what to do. Turns out the rich guy with a woman chained up in his house is the wrong dude to mess with. Who would have guessed?

Looks like it could be a decent movie with some twists and turns, but let’s be honest, I am not paying to see it and you aren’t either.

Overboard – Eugenio Derbez, Anna Faris, Eva Longoria, John Hannah, and Swoosie Kurtz

Finally! The remake that EVERYBODY has been waiting for! Ha, just kidding. Nobody wanted this. I am convinced the only reason this exists is because there is a game in Hollywood where they are seeing what the dumbest possible remake could be that still makes money.

I only made it through the first 30 seconds of this trailer. I punted right after they did the thing where Anna Faris is called ugly by the lead male because she was wearing a work polo and had her hair up. How is that still a thing in movies? That was eye-rolling when I was in middle school and Rachael Leigh Cook was ugly because she wore glasses and painted pictures.

I like Faris a lot and find her funny and charming. It is a shame her first live-action movie in over five years has to be a remake of an overrated ’80s comedy.

Tully – Charlize Theron, Mackenzie Davis, Mark Duplass and Ron Livingston

***Please excuse me while we pause this movie preview for a special alert***

ONE OF US!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! SHE IS ONE OF USSSSSS! DIABLO CODY LIVED HERE FOR A WHILE!!!! WOOOOO!!! ONE OF US!!!! SHE WROTE JUNO AT TARGET WHEN SHE LIVED HERE OR SOMETHING!!!! WOOOOOOOOO ONE. OF. US. M-I-N-N-E-S-O-T-A!

Alright, now that we have that out of our system. Tully is the latest collaboration from writer Diablo Cody and director Jason Reitman, who paired up for the highly successful Juno and then the less-successful but still really good Young Adult.

Tully is the story of a stressed-out, overworked mom (played by Charlize Theron, who also starred in Young Adult) who begins to get part of her life back once she meets a real-life Mary Poppins — the title character Tully — who works as a night nanny for the family. Shout to everyone’s guy Ron Livingston who plays the husband/father. Everybody loves Livingston.

This one has the look and feel of the first two Cody/Reitman collaborations and has gotten some solid reviews on the festival circuit. It will be a nice change of pace for those who want something other than CGI superheroes blowing each other up.

May 11

Breaking In – Gabrielle Union, Seth Carr, and Ajiona Alexus

A woman’s father unexpectedly dies so she and her two kids go to his mansion to sort out his affairs. But would you get this? There are four bad guys already at the mansion looking to find her father’s safe. The kids end up getting taken hostage inside the house (because of course), and the mom is locked outside. From the looks of things, mom then turns into a badass Batman-type to get her kids back.

It stars Gabrielle Union who looks pretty awesome in this role. You might remember her from a string of 1990s and 2000s movies like She’s All That, Bring it On, and Bad Boys II. She has been acting forever and has recently been nominated for a bunch of NAACP Image Awards for her work on the show Being Mary Jane. Cool to see her in a lead role here. Hope the movie does well. Oh, and fun fact: she is married to Dwayne Wade.

Life of the Party – Melissa McCarthy, Molly Gordon, Gillian Jacobs, Maya Rudolph, Julie Bowen, Matt Walsh, Debby Ryan, Stephen Root, and Jacki Weaver

This is a movie where Melissa McCarthy plays a mom going through a divorce who decides to enroll in the same college as her daughter.

I feel like there is a pretty clear distinction between people who find that premise appealing and people who would rather watch a cute baby animal drown. I also feel like everybody reading this knows what side of the fence they fall on. Move on? Yeah, let’s move on.

May 18

Deadpool II – Ryan Reynolds, Josh Brolin, Morena Baccarin, Julian Dennison, Zazie Beetz, T.J. Miller, Brianna Hildebrand, and Jack Kesy

They decided to make a sequel to the highest-grossing R-rated movie of all time. Bold strategy, Cotton. We’ll see if it pays off.

Kidding, of course. People have been pumped for more of everyone’s favorite potty-mouthed superhero since leaving the theater for the first one. This one was obviously a huge hit and the sequel will make a boatload of money, so much money in fact it could take a big chunk out of the money that Disney was hoping to make on Solo: A Star Wars Story next week.

I am someone who is pretty lukewarm on superhero movies. I dive in for the big ones but am no means a guy who sees them all. But I loved the original ‘Pool and only saw it because of the buzz around the marketing. I was so intrigued by the idea of an R-rated superhero movie. Not that I am a “Ohhhhh I NEED boobs and f-bombs in my movies!” kinda guy, but the PG-13 formula has gotten a bit stale in a lot of genres, especially superheroes. It was fun to see them make one without worrying about selling toys and Halloween costumes to kids.

Just have to wonder how many interviews ol’ TJ ‘bomb threat’ Miller will be doing for this one. Whoops!

Book Club – Diane Keaton, Jane Fonda, Candice Bergen, and Mary Steenburgen.

I am going to copy/paste the synopsis from Wikipedia for Book Club and I’ll explain why afterwards.

”Four older women spend their lives attending a book club where they bond over the typical suggested literature. One day, they end up reading Fifty Shades of Grey and are turned on by the content. Viewing it as a wake up call, they decide to expand their lives and chase pleasures that have eluded them.”

I just wanted to lay it out there very cut and dry what this movie is about. I am doing everyone a service. The last thing I want is for someone to think “I saw there is some new Diane Keaton comedy out. Mom loves her! Maybe I’ll be a good son/daughter and take her to go see this.” Maybe just do lunch instead? This one could make for an awkward viewing experience with mom. You’re welcome.

Show Dogs – Will Arnett, Chris “Ludacris” Bridges, Natasha Lyonne, Jordin Sparks, Gabriel Iglesias, Shaquille O’Neal, Omar Chaparro, and Stanley Tucci

Nahhh.

May 25

Solo: A Star Wars Story – Alden Ehrenreich, Woody Harrelson, Emilia Clarke, Donald Glover, Thandie Newton, Phoebe Waller-Bridge, Joonas Suotamo, and Paul Bettany.

Anybody else feeling a bit of Star Wars overkill? This is the fourth Star Wars movie in two and a half years. Even for me, a huge Star Wars fan, this is getting to be a bit much. But I guess we better get used to it. This Disney train ain’t slowing down any time soon.

You may have heard by now but the second standalone Star Wars movie has been a bit of a cluster since filming started. Long story short: they hired the guys who made the Lego movie to direct this thing but fired them midway through because Disney execs hated what they were seeing and hired Charlie Cunningham from Happy Days to finish it off. Oh, and apparently the kid who plays Han Solo, one of the most charismatic movie characters ever, has all the personality of a wet paper towel. Great!

But it is Star Wars, and all Happy Days jokes aside, Ron Howard is obviously a GOAT. You, me and everyone else is still going to see it, right? I know I will. They could release From Justin to Kelly by calling it From Justin to Kelly: A Star Wars Story and just CGI Chewbacca into a few scenes and I would pay to go check it out.

This will be a good test to see just how much (if any) Star Wars fatigue there is and just how far Disney can stretch this thing before people stop showing up.

That’s what we have coming out in the month of May. We will be back next month to talk about DINOSAURS GOING RAWWWRRRR in Jurassic World.

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